Dear Netflix: We've both changed...

Dear Netflix,

I got your letter last week. When I saw you were going to raise my rate by $4 a month, I assumed you would be giving me something cool in return. I mean, I get that postage has gone up and stuff... but I thought maybe that cost had been offset by the annoying deal you made to not get some new movies until a month after they had been released. I guess I was wrong.

I have to admit, at first I was kind of upset. But then I realized that we've been together for over 6 years. People (and mail-order DVD rental companies) change. We've drifted apart. We used to fly through our 3-at-a-time plan like lightning. Now sometimes you sit on my entertainment center for weeks. I realize some of this is my fault. I used to be more decisive. My queue was like a well-oiled machine. Somewhere along the way, I got caught up in instant gratification. By the time your next disc arrived, my head was somewhere else. That's when I started seeing Redbox on the side.

But now that I've had some time to think about it, I actually want to thank you for your price increase.

You see, I've been saying for a while "Hey, we should try that new streaming thing Netflix has." But we never did. Then you said "Hey, what if you can stream to your Playstation 3?" I was intrigued. But didn't have wireless internet.

This week, your price increase made me take a long, hard look at myself. And, quite frankly, I'm was a bit of a mess.

So, I called our internet provider. I got much faster internet that would support streaming. I finally got that wireless router I've been talking about. And, since my internet is bundled with my Dish Network, I made some changes there too. All said and done, your price hike is going to save me about $35 a month.

The bad news for you is that you won't be mailing me as many movies (and only getting half as much money from me every month)... but I kind of think maybe that's what you wanted all along. Not to worry, I'll still let you send me one at a time since your streaming choices are limited.

And, who knows, maybe this will help us rekindle the spark in our relationship.

Sincerely,

Aud

PS: I look forward to having fewer of your front covers and tape strip thingies to throw away. For some reason, my husband likes to litter the entertainment center with them. I mean, the trash is just around the corner, but that's a whole different letter.

**********

In case you are wondering why have I shared this pretendy letter with you, it's for two reason. A) I'm kind of excited that we are getting more services every month for quite a bit less money. And, as per usual, David is insufficiently enthused. He likes the saving money part - but not the part where I can't contain my excitement and am telling random people.  B) Have you looked at your monthly services lately? I'm so bad about that sort of thing. I could have made most of these changes months ago. My Dish package had outdated pricing. Now I have more channels and free HD for a lot less. My internet provider had a special going on the router I wanted. Our PS3 is a pretty handy tool we were barely using.

I need to put a reminder in my calendar to check those things every year or so. Or maybe you guys could just remind me...   

Dancing with the Stars: Season 11 FINALE

Is that the coveted mirror ball trophy? It is?! That can only mean one thing....

DANCING (looooong pause) with the Stars... FINALE!!!

In case you missed last week's semi-finals, some guy in Wisconsin (I told you those people were suspect) shot his TV because he didn't like Bristol Palin's paso doble. And then... and then! The universe granted my wish for mean ol' Brandy to be voted off. Let's just say that she hadn't practiced her Joey Tribbiani - Gracious Loser face.

This week, I decided to save my recap until after the results show. There were two dances Monday night and two dances Tuesday night that factored into the score. (Also, for any of you tempted to shoot your TVs, Host Tom explained how the scoring worked. Essentially, it's a percentage of the total judges points available. So, even if someone is 5 or 6 points behind the leader, they might only be 1% behind. Then they factor in the total votes cast and determine which percentage went to each contestant. They combine the two percentages and the highest one wins. Or something like that. I'm really bad at math.)

Anyway, it would take days to do a blow-by-blow of all four dances by all three contestants... and there's other stuff that bears mentioning. Like David Hassellhoff. So, instead, here's a quick summary:

Night One featured a "redemption dance" - a style of dance the couple struggled with earlier in the season, but new music and choreography- and the freestyle. Night Two featured a "favorite dance" - where the couple repeated a dance from earlier in the season (same music and choreography) and an "instant" cha cha - where everyone did their own dance to the same song with only about 30 minutes to prepare.

Kyle and Lacey: Their redemption dance was the foxtrot. The first time they did it, they did the Charlie's Angels thing. This one was much better. Their freestyle was to Tootsie Roll. It was really energetic and fun. And it greatly disturbed me how many words David and I still know to that song. And by "how many words" I mean "all the words". For their favorite dance, they chose the tango. The one where Lacey wore weird granny panties with garters attached to a bizarre skirt. Finally, their instant cha cha started a little slow but ended up great.

Bristol and Mark: Their redemption dance was the jive. That was their ill-fated gorilla suit dance from earlier in the season. This time was a lot better but still not Bristol's cup of tea. Their freestyle was to Cell Block Tango from the musical Chicago. It didn't suit her. As much as I love Mark, I have to question his choice. And I say "his" because I doubt she came in and said "My favorite song ever is ___. I HAVE to do my freestyle to it." He should have picked something younger and more fun... or at least a song she'd heard of. Their favorite dance was the tango from Rock Week. I agree. That was a good choice. Though she insisted again on breaking the hold to play air guitar. I think it showed she was finally having fun, even though she knew it would cost her a few points. Their instant cha cha actually ended up being one of her best dances yet.

Jennifer and Derek: They redeemed themselves in the paso. In fact, Carrie Ann loved it so much she shouted her entire critique. Happy shouting, but still...  For their freestyle, they chose "Do You Love Me". And even better, they opened with her in a frumpy dress... CARRYING A WATERMELON!!!!!! After Night One, Jennifer injured her back and wasn't sure if she'd be able to compete on Night Two. The doctor diagnosed it as a ruptured disc, did some doctory thing, and said she could continue if she wanted. So she did. For their favorite dance, they chose their Week One Viennese waltz. This is the one where Jennifer broke down because of all the Swayze memories. She thought it would be a good way to bookend the competition - first her connection to Patrick, now to Derek. Finally, their instant cha cha was good. I think she held back a tiny bit, but still good.

Important note: On Night One, Brooke asked Jennifer why they didn't choose Time of My Life for their freestyle. She said that was a dance for "me and Patrick... Patrick and I". Then David said "Did she just correct herself incorrectly?" It was possibly the funniest and proudest wife moment I've ever had.

Now, before we get to the winner, let's discuss some of the finale shenanigans. And, believe me, there were shenanigans-a-plenty!

Christmas Card Conundrum

I haven't sent out Christmas cards in three or four years. Back then, I sent out such a cute card that I was certain I could never top it. So, why even try, right?

Last year my great-aunt told my mom she wasn't getting me a Christmas gift anymore because I took her off my Christmas card list. My mom explained that I took everyone off my list and hadn't sent out cards in ages. I had no idea my laziness was causing a riff in the family.

So, I've decided to send out cards again this year. No, not only to spare my aunt's feelings... but just because it has been a while and it seems fun again. I kind of got back in the mood after perusing so many websites looking for invitations for my grandparents' 60th anniversary party a few months ago.

Now comes the hard part... deciding which cards to send out. I've gotten hooked on Shutterfly and have already ordered a few Christmas gifts from them, so I've narrowed it down to their site. But then there are still tons of cool cards. What's a girl to do?

I really like the idea of this one:

I could share some of the highlights of our year... without doing the "Christmas letter". Plus, you know I love lists.

Or there's this one:

It's a more "winter" color scheme than traditional "Christmas"... which I like. Plus, there's enough room for pictures that all our fur children could have their own area.

Or about a million more I like. It's just so hard to pick.

~What about you? Where do you land on the Christmas cards?~

Movie Review Monday: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part One

By this point, I'm sure it comes as no surprise to you that I'm particularly fond of a certain teenage wizard with a lightning bolt scar. So, of course, I braved the theater opening weekend to see Deathly Hallows, Part One. No, I did not brave a midnight showing. I love Harry Potter... and that's why I didn't want to fall asleep in the middle of the movie.

Given my recent pilgrimage to Mecca Wizarding World, I was even more excited for this movie. Well, excited in the way I'm always excited about books I love being turned into movies. So, cautiously optimistic.

(There will be spoilers in this post. But, I figure that's okay since I can't imagine why you wouldn't have already read the book anyway.)

I was thrilled the book was going to be made into two different movies. There is so much detail and it's the end of the story; I just didn't think it could be done justice in one movie. That being said, two and a half hours for half the story did feel a little long at times, but that's how the book felt too. And I think that was intentional. Plus, I'd prefer a few slow parts to a butchered storyline like some of the movies have been.

Overall, I was very happy with the movie. That's important because I wasn't all that happy with Half Blood Prince. HBP glanced over really important details (like much detail about horcruxes) in favor of adding pointless scenes that weren't in the book (the burning of The Burrow). Deathly Hallows was a lot truer to the book. In fact, hardly anything jumped out at me as different. I mean, there were differences but it worked a lot better. The only things that I wished had been included were Harry and Dudley's goodbye and Pettigrew's death. I missed both of those things. I also wish they would have mentioned that saying "Voldemort" was the new trace that allowed people to be tracked. The only thing that really caught my attention as "added" was the scene with Harry and Hermione dancing in the tent. But, I didn't mind it. I think it showed some of the emotion that came across in the book but hadn't yet transferred to the screen. It showed how lonely and depressing being on the lam would be and how, once and for all, Harry and Hermione are just friends. It wasn't a romantic scene. It was a "let's make the best of this and try to laugh in spite of it all" scene.

Was it a cheery, sunny movie? No. People (and owls and house elves) died. If you've read the book, you know more people are going to die in the next one. But, for a book to movie adaptation, it was well done. I have to constantly remind myself that they can't match up 100%. I think this is as close as it gets. I give it an A.

However, I give the audience at my showing a big, fat F. First, someone had an infant in the theater who cried and cried... and cried. It's not a big deal that someone brought a baby (maybe their sitter cancelled or something) but if the baby starts crying, um, take it outside. Period. Second, I lost count of how many people thought the outside exit was the exit to the hallway. It's always nice to get a big burst of sunlight on the middle of the screen.  Next, the people who sat behind us brought their 7 or so year old. This wasn't a kids' movie. It was rated PG-13 for a reason. I did NOT enjoy being kicked in the back EVERY.SINGLE.TIME something intense happened on screen. Ugh. I knew I should have brought my wand. A little perfecto totalis would have cured all those problem!

A confession and a rant...

Let me start by saying that, yes, I know about 90% of you are not going to like what I'm about to say. That's fine. If I can get through the day with 10% of the people I encounter not cussing me, it's been an alright day.

So, what is this highly controversial topic? TSA pat-downs? Bristol Palin's continued run on Dancing with the Stars? No, no... it's worse.

*deep breath*

I don't like Christmas.

*deep breath*

Why I don't like Christmas is a whole different post. But, what I like even less is Christmas in mid-November. Why? Because I do like Thanksgiving. I think it's mean to just skip over it. So does my friend, Kerri. You can read why here. (Although she may call our friendship into question after my anti-Christmas confession.)

Anyway, we've come to the purpose of today's rant.

*Warning. What you are about to see is disturbing. You might want to send younger viewers out of the room.*

This is a house a road over from mine. A house I have to pass every day to get to my house. A house that breaks all but one of my holiday decorating rules. And... here's the kicker... I took this picture

YESTERDAY!!!!!

November freaking 18th. (And it's been up several days prior. I just didn't have my camera.)

I don't mind that other people are more festive than me. I get that I'm a Scrooge. But mid-November for a full-on light display? I've seen another house in the neighborhood that has their tree up. That doesn't bother me as much. I still think it's early, but it doesn't make me stabby. But this it way too much, way too soon.

I think it should land them on the Naughty list.

~What do you think? Am I alone in thinking it crosses the line?~

And, since you asked (wait, you didn't ask? I don't understand) maybe I'll share with you a breakdown of how this breaks all my decor rules in a future post.

Dancing With The Stars: Week 9

Last week, Kurt Warner and Anna were voted off. Can I just say that I think Kurt Warner is a class act? Not just on this show, but in general.

So, now here we are at the semifinals of Dancing with the Stars. It occurred to me last night that this has been going on a looong time. I mean, it seems like a whole different season that The Hoff was voted off and Michael Bolton acted like a baby because Bruno was mean to him.

Anyway, this week will feature each couple doing two dances: a latin dance where the celebrity must do a solo part, and a ballroom dance that will be preceded by a weepy back story of the difficulties the celebrity has faced. Like last week, I'm grouping both dances together for my recap.

Brandy and Maks

Latin dance: They have a paso doble, which Brandy wanted to dedicate to anyone who has been bullied. So I guess she meant Maks. I mean, it's no wonder he acted out last week with Carrie Ann. He's a victim of Brandy's bullying. For real, bullying is a very serious problem... but is Brandy the best advocate against it? And, can you even take her seriously when she is dressed like a vampire? What was with that outfit? It looked straight out of Interview with a Vampire. Not cool. And not sure why Maks was wearing genie pants and tennis shoes. But whatever. Oh, and the dance was also fairly vampire-ish. I mean, what was with her teeth? It was a good paso, but it was weird. Not her best.

Reaction from the judges: Carrie Ann and Len thought it was great and passionate. Bruno said Brandy might need anger management. Then she lunged for his neck. Okay, she didn't. But I bet she wanted to.

Background story: Everyone from Whitney Houston to one of the Destiny's Child chicks to her parents did an "E! True Hollywood Story" recap of how driven Brandy is and how the car crash she was involved in could have ruined her but she got through it. (She was involved in a crash and the other driver was killed. It was ruled not to have been her fault.)

Ballroom dance: They had an Argentine tango. I thought it was good and the lifts were really nice. What annoyed me was how much of the dance took place on the steps around the stage. I mean, it's Dancing with the STARS. Not Dancing with the STAIRS.

Reaction from the judges: Fantastic and dynamic and stuff. And Bruno excitedly flailed into Len.

Scores: 27 / 30... 57

Big Announcement (No, I'm NOT Pregnant!)

A few weeks ago, the world's cutest chihuahua appeared at my sister's house. I was convinced Bruiser needed a little sister. I decided to name her Lucy (in the sky with diamonds). Then David said he just had a feeling it wasn't a good idea for us to keep her. And by "David", I mean "my big, horrible, ogre of a husband". After throwing a temper tantrum, complete with tears, it was decided that Lucy would live with my parents and I could visit her and puppysit her and be her co-mom. So I stopped calling David names. At least out loud.

Less than a week later, he called and said "Remember when I said I just didn't think we should keep Lucy?" Um, did he have a death wish? Why would he bring that back up?! But I decided to let him explain before I jumped all over him.

"We're getting another dog..."

I said nothing. I thought some pretty ugly things. Then he explained further.

"When we get back from vacation, I'm getting Maize..."

Insert me squealing with glee. Repeatedly.

Maize is the K9 officer for our police department and David is her new handler. And I'm stoked! And so is he!

I've always thought being a K9 handler was the coolest job in the whole police force. It amazes how well trained the dogs can be and what important work they can do in tandem with a great handler.

David begins his training in a few days. Maize is actually already trained. (She's a scent dog, not an attack dog. Her training is in sniffing out drugs and weapons, as well as tracking people.) She is about 3 years old and previously 'employed' by the Game and Fish Commission. They canceled their K9 program and donated the dogs to small departments who wouldn't have been able to afford it otherwise. She's been with David's department for several months now but the previous handler had some family obligations come up that would make it difficult to keep the extra responsibility of handling Maize. So, she moved in with us on Monday!

Well, "moved out", I guess. She will live outside - which is taking me a little while to get used to. Some people have suggested that I spoil dogs. *eye roll*  But, for various reasons (like not dulling her senses, getting her too domesticated, etc.) she will be kept outside except during extreme weather. She'll ride with David during his work day, make frequent visits to the schools, assist on traffic stops, etc.

Basically, she's awesome. I'm really happy for David. He's excited about the opportunity. And I'm excited to buy her a sweater. Oh yeah, it's happening.  :-)

So, without further ado, meet Maize:

Isn't her badge so cool?!

Dancing with the Stars: Week 8

Seriously, what week is this? I have no idea. So, um, it's Week (fill in the blank) of Dancing with the Stars.

Last week, Rick Fox and Cheryl were sent home. I didn't get to watch the results show. I was busy. But my cousin Jarrod reported that "the tall guy" went home. So that's really all the information I have. Whew. Good thing Eliza Dushku got her free publicity on last Monday's show, huh? Anyway, Rick's blinding white teeth and hint of creepiness will be missed. Or not.

This week, DWTS continued its "revamp". I guess they surmised people were getting bored with week after week of just rehearsing and dancing. Therefore, this season has been full of theme weeks and dance marathons and various other shenanigans. This week was no exception. The couples prepared one dance like usual. Then they were given the type of dance for a second performance but were only given the music after their first dance was completed. So, they had roughly a half hour to actually coordinate the steps they had been rehearsing with the music they had just been given. And, alas, INSTANT DANCE was born. Only 30 minutes isn't instant. Imagine if instant coffee or instant oatmeal took 30 minutes. Then it would just be regular coffee or regular oatmeal. But, I guess in the world of B list celebrities learning ballroom dance, 30 minutes is fairly instant. Plus, I couldn't do it in that short of time. Still, the word 'instant' irked me. Moving on...

Though all the regular dances were performed and then the "instant" dances were performed, I'm lumping the recaps together. If DWTS keeps up this wackiness next season, I'm going to need a spreadsheet.

Kyle Massey and Lacey

Regular dance: Their first dance was a Viennese waltz to Breathe by Anna Nalick. Just FYI: Breathe is one of my favorite songs ever. I think DWTS should run all their music by me. If I really like a song, they wouldn't be allowed to butcher use it. I thought Kyle and Lacey performed their well. It was graceful.

Judges: Bruno said it was charming. Len said Kyle was a gorgeous orchid. Carrie Ann said her crush on Kyle was back.

Not-so-instant dance: They had to jive to Good Golly Miss Molly. When teaching him the steps, Lacey wanted to prepare Kyle for any challenge - you know, because he wouldn't know the music. So, she brought in Steve-O to blow airhorns and leaf blowers at him. And parade around naked. But, I guess it worked. Their jive did not look like something thrown together in a half hour. It was really good and really fun.

Judges: They loved the timing and the entertainment value. Carrie Ann waved her arms around a lot.

Scores: 27 / 29... 56

Jennifer Grey and Derek

Regular dance: Again this week, Jen's injuries were the focus of rehearsal. She had to see a doctor about tendinitis in her knee. He said it was a tough decision if she should continue. Then her dad dropped by. Mostly he hugged her and told her how good she was doing. From that, she said it reminded her who she was and that the show must go on. And it did. Their quickstep was great and didn't look at all like they wimped out on account of her knee.

Judges: They all thought it was gorgeous and Fred and Ginger-like but noted a tiny misstep.

Not-so-instant dance: They had a rumba to a song I didn't write down. I liked it. It didn't blow me out of the water. (Probably because I was in my living room, not in the water.)

Judges: I guess the judges were in the water because they were totally blown out of it. They thought it was beautiful and sensual and a bunch of other adjectives. And gave her perfect tens across the board.

Scores: 27 / 30... 57

I Solemnly Swear I'm Up To No Good...

I'm baaaack! From where, you ask? Here....

Hogwarts Castle





Butterbeer in Hogsmeade

Last week, David and I (along with his sister and her husband) took a trip to Orlando. The primary mission was  (**NERD ALERT**) to see every square inch of The Wizarding World of Harry Potter at Universal Studios. Mission accomplished! It was AWESOME!! I'll spare you the drawn out, overly-enthusiastic vacation recap (mostly because I'm still exhausted), but if you want to see the majority of the pictures, you can find them here.  (I have a few more that I need to add. It's hard to pick out only 160 pictures out of 700. Yes, 160. Yes, 700.)

David got to meet his
hero, Wolverine



Wizarding World was really well done. It was a bit smaller than I had hoped, but it's just opened, so maybe they'll expand in the future. And then, of course, I'll have to go back. Anyway, I thought it was fairly true to the movies (not entirely - like shops from Diagon Alley were mixed in with shops from Hogsmeade - but nothing to dwell on). There were a lot of store facades I wished had been real stores (the existing stores were small and easily crowded) but those are my only "cons". Everything else was a giant pro. The Forbidden Journey ride was freaking incredible. It was a great adventure. (The rest of Universal was also nice. David loved Marvel Superhero Island.)

Then we spent a two days at Disney. And saw all four Disney parks. Three of them on the same day. (See: exhausted)  In the past, I've been quite the Disney hater. I was not psyched about going there again. But, this was a much better experience. Visiting at an off-peak time is definitely key. Throw in some rain and that helps keep the crowds down even more. It was really fun.

It was great to spend some time with my siblings-in-law. They moved out of state last year. We were used to seeing them several times a month. Only seeing them a few times a year is not nearly as fun. So the whole week was fantastic.

In addition, I have a first cousin, Chad, who lives in Orlando. The history of my dad's family would take multiple blog posts, but the short version is that I'd never met him. We'd "Facebook met" but if we'd met in person, we were both too young to remember. He and his boyfriend, Chris, had dinner with us one of the nights we were there. It was definitely one of the highlights of the trip and they are both really warm, fun people.

I've run out of synonyms for "incredible" and "fun", so I'll wrap this up. I've probably left out some details you're wondering about - because I know you sit around all day thinking "I must know more about this trip! Is it true you ate Indian food? Did you like it? How long were the lines for the rides? Did David really get freaked out by the It's a Small World ride?"  (Yes, yes, not bad at all, yes) So just holler if there's something I missed. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go attempt to cast spells on people with my new wand. Yes, I bought a wand. Like you didn't see that coming.

Dancing with the Stars: Week 6 or 7... I can't remember

So this is going to be short and sweet... as well as choppy and
probably misspelled. I'm typing it on my iPhone from a condo while on
vacation. I'm watching without a DVR... and I'm cranky from having
heat rash where you don't want to have heat rash.

Last week, Audrina went home. Kind of a shocker because she was a good
dancer... but, on the other hand, how many fans can she really have?

This week was the 200th episode and featured nods to past seasons,
including guest judges and other shenanigans. First, Kristi Yamaguchi
and Apolo Ono (yum) were captains for a team cha cha cha contest. Team
Kristi featured Rick, Bristol, and Kyle. They earned 24 points. Team
Apolo featured Brandy, Kurt, and Jennifer - whose doctor said she has
to take a break every two hours. They earned 27. Those points were
added to the individual scores.

Kyle and Lacey: Their dance was a paso doble that was to be inspired
by guest judge Mel B and Maks' performance. To be more like Maks, Kyle
drew a six pack on with a Sharpie. Hilarious! I thought their dance
was very good! So did the judges. Len said it was their best so far.
Score: 59 (35 solo, 24 team)

Kurt and Anna: Well, he's a football player, so of course his dance
inspiration / guest judge was Emmett Smith. Their tango was good but I
thought his posture was off a little. Again, the judges agreed. I
guess I'm getting better at this.
Score: 58 (34 solo, 27 team)

Bristol and Mark: Their Viennese waltz was inspired by guest judge
Kelly Osbourne. I thought their dance was smooth and entertaining. Her
performance factor is up, for sure. The judges used words like poetic
and natural.
Score: 57 (33 solo, 24 team)

Rick and Cheryl: Helio Castoneves' quickstep was their inspiration.
And rehearsal was our first official glimpse of Rick's age-
inappropriate girlfriend, Eliza Dushku. Their performance included
Rick looking like Gumby in a bright green suit. Other than that, and
too many goofy faces, it wasn't bad. The judges loved it... said it
was his best dance yet.
Score: 57 (33 solo, 24 team)

Brandy and Maks: They got Gilles Marini's foxtrot. I actually enjoyed
it. Given how much I've come to dislike Brandy, that's the best I can
muster. But, she is a great dancer. Just a questionable human. The
judges thought it was sizzling and unreal and stuff.
Score: 64 (37 solo, 27 team)

Jennifer and Derek: Drew Lachey's tango was their inspiration.
Jennifer's body was their problem. She's really breaking down. I
thought Derek was super classy for saying "It's just a dance show."
But their performance was fantastic. The judges thought it was an
awesome comeback.
Score: 64 (37 solo, 27 team)

Once again, I'm not sure who I think will go home. I'm leaning towards
Bristol and Mark... but I just love Mark so much. And I'm really over
Rick. Hmm... just hard to say.

I probably won't get to watch tomorrow, so maybe someone will tweet me
the results. That would be swell. Be back next week with pictures and
spellcheck.